Major upswings after a 'minor' downhill :D (9-22nd Sept)

So keep on reading please after this first bit ;)

Last week felt more like a rocky downhill on the usual roller coaster ride of life particularly thanks to the (shadow) masculine and feminine interaction. A carousel ride of impatience, indecisiveness, criticism, unreliability; blaming, projection, deflection perceived by both parties about each other. Hmmm…

From my perspective and based on talking to my soul sisters our wounds of not feeling good enough, feeling insecure and attacked are greatly triggered by the masculine energy. The general feminine attributes of being more receptive, flowy, sensitive and picking up easily on expectations, needs, wants coming from others around us, makes us often feel not strong enough to stay firm in our core. Surely the masculine is to teach us boundaries, for us who are like sponges. What is a yes and what is no, how to stand up for yourself and stay committed, communicate that with compassion. How not to abandon yourself as a woman when you feel pushed into certain directions.

To me it seems that my sensitive soul sisters are doing an awesome job feeling those uncomfortable emotions, doing the inner work, being aware and conscious of their reactions, words, actions… As if for the women around me it’s easier to go straight into the sadness instead of having to go through the anger, powerlessness first and then to the fear. While I see the masculine around me so often react quickly with anger and act out of powerlessness which can be so scary for the feminine and makes us feel unsafe. I know anger all too well from the past, both in my external and internal world which makes it so that it’s more and more tiring for me to stay around the harshness of it. However, it seems I’m still very much triggering it in the masculine and surely it can still get me too. We all have the fears of abandonment, rejection, being alone, getting hurt, not feeling good enough and even more so we have so much LOVE for each other..

So much love, caring, joy, consideration, generosity and genuine kindness for each other. This world can be too loud, fast and harsh for all us. Our world and we need gentleness, softness, resting, breathing, safety, quietness, slowness, intimacy, cuddling and caressing. The feminine loves to be held slowly, embraced in safety and loves to give softness if we know how to ask for it and receive it. The images are the frequency paintings of Divine Masculine and Feminine Activation by Teal. She says "divine masculine is what is going to support the birth process of the new earth, which is being brought into manifestation by the divine feminine". So be it. 💓

13th Friday my „luckiest day” of the week – healing and resting in divine feminine energies

Friday 13th was not just not unlucky but on the contrary a super blessed day for me. In the afternoon I went for chanting with Omkari, yin yoga class led by my beloved soul sister Mayra and eventually cuddle puddle with my lovely soul sister Paulina. I was so so so grateful for the healing, gentle, feminine presence of my sisters after a challenging week. Being with my soul sisters is where I can fully be myself, let my guards down, be free and safe at home within myself and with them. Just like it says on Teal’s quote, it actually really is with my soul sisters that I truly feel the warmth, the relief, the exhale, the relaxation, the peace the most… Have felt this with my twin flame masculine too.

After yin yoga Paulina and I are sitting back to back and feeling the warmth of each others’ heart. In this gentle, loving, safe bubble the tension, pain, grief can release smoothly the heart space. Spending so much time in Bali last year I was so used to going to women’s circle and dance temples where us girls were cuddling and missed it so much here in Copenhagen. We are just lying next to each other, holding each other in our arms and can sink into deep relaxation. These are so precious moments of the daily lives otherwise full of running around, full of thoughts and to do’s. She feels safe and comfortable enough to fall asleep while I stay half awake in this deeply relaxed state.

As she is asleep her body releases some tension and relaxes even more, I’m holding space and breathing deep. It is amazing to sense the energy circling and flowing, to feel how our wombs are healing as our hearts are connected. I’m sinking deep into this all embracing mother energy: so deep, so loving, so patient, so peaceful. And I feel the soul of my son again, he is yet to be born. It feels beyond blessed to be in this vibration where I can feel his presence. He is such a beautiful, old soul, so calm and wise. I remember again how his spirit was there with me years ago in healing a trauma so I can become his mum one day. I always feel incredibly blessed, grateful and humbled when I feel his presence and remember his unconditional love. So much healing! 💓Incredibly magical Pisces full moon vibes and conviction that sisters’ cuddling has to be part our lives!

So after all this soft feminine healing space we go dumpster diving as life must go on. :D Last week particularly I was shocked again how much food is being thrown out and this prompted me to wanting to go to the foodsharing events and visit the backyard of some foodstores after closing hours. ;) So there we are with Paulina, fishing in the dumpster in the moonshine of Pisces full moon and we have a such a great catch! :D lol The gift of abundance really! And we laugh that this is life, the contrast can be so fun. :D I have no picture taken of the event haha but pictures of my four sisters here who are true environmentalists at heart and greatly inspire me. I love them so!

14th Saturday the most magical day of the week

Sat 14th Sept was a date I’ve been really looking forward to for a month! The Festival in the Magic Garden: celebrating its 10th anniversary together with Lellah Ecat’s birthday and the Full Moon! An entire day full of totally amazing music, wonderful program, connection, community, consciousness and more! This place is the cradle and nest of my awesome life transforming plant medicine inner journey, cannot even begin to describe how much I love the garden and crew. Jacob and Lellah are such incredibly beautiful, powerful souls. Lellah’s singing voice is out of this world magnificent, from the angelic realm, from the highest dimensions, She is certainly a Fairy Empress and Elf Queen.

And the soul sisters connections I have with the amazing Alionah, Eva, Nathalia, Tatsiana, Kasia ...Once again feeling so at home, so free and safe to be myself, with my sisters we don’t need to talk really, we just hug and cry and laugh together. We just dance and have so much love for each other. Saying that I felt blessed and grateful that day is an understatement..

15th Sunday dancing ecstatically in joy and freedom

First thing the morning after the Sunday night ecstatic dance I wrote a FB post that it was again some next level awesomeness. I was incredibly grateful to Anelia, Byron, the fellow dancers of Ecstatic Dance Denmark for co-creating spaces where you can LOOSE IT COMPLETELY and BE TOTALLY FREE!!! To be free who you want to be in that moment and for me that was my fairy dolphin inner child!‍ Amazing space where I could roll around on the floor like a hazelnut; move freestyle, totally uncoordinated like an inflatable air dancer; feel safe to give love to my body and have amazing connections and family feeling when I shared dances with fellow travellers. Basically I just kept on dancing for hours as the music was so awesome that I didn’t wanna stop. I got super high on dancing so freely and playfully, shining the light and sharing the joy! The blisters on my toes and blue spots on my knees are a really good sign, haha

This blog is getting long but this week has been full of magical moments too J

One of the highlights is for the sure the women’s sharing circle. This time remembering our childhoods, watching our favourite fairy tales and cartoons together, stuffing ourselves with awesome snacks and treats…evenings like this make my heart sing. J I love the connections forged between sisters during these evenings. For example, I get to walk her awesome dog, Henrietta, with my ’alien rockstar sister’ Ginta next evening out in the urban wilderness. Later today I’m heading to my Soul Sister and her baby starfish daughter for the weekend. She has been there for me the longest both in this and other lifetimes. My love for her is too deep for words.

I'm always being called to be alone in nature so I get to hear the messages of my Soul in the silence.💓 My fairy nature loves to spend time in the forest, my dolphin nature calls me to the sea. My Inner Safe Haven is actually the combination of the two: an island with an enchanted forest surrounded by silver sea. A place where the red fox, dragonflies, forest animals, fairies and dolphins, whales can live together. When I do the womb breathing I see this being appearing in a wonderfully beautiful form which embodies the energy of my womb. She asks me to rest and feel safe. So I'm resting on the beach by the sea and alone in the silence of the forest. I feel so grateful for this priviledge: that I have a life in which I get to just be and rest quite often. Thinking of those who can't and sending them 💓

Saturday afternoon I'm by the sea, sunday afternoon I'm home in the fairy realm. Entering alone the silence of forest I feel right away immense love and gratitude for this creation with all Her beauties.
My Soul remembers home...and this deep love is clearing out whatever pain or tension is dwelling in my heart space at that moment. Then I hear the sound of my soul: Li ya, we are here to feel deeply, shine brightly, love fiercely AND softly 😉, play joyfully, dance estatically, hug tightly, caress gently, move slowly, embrace safely, speak quietly, listen carefully...be lovely 🥰

Just thinking back to the beginning of the blog this comes to my mind: so tired when the (shadow) masculine is trying to tell me what to do, how to feel, when he thinks he knows better and tries to be overruling, controlling, playing the usual power games...ah ’You know nothing John Snow’…you really don’t. It’s time for the feminine to be free, safe, love(d), nurture(d) and (have) fun.. and as I write this the sun shines for the first time on this gloomy Friday morning and the synchronistic number not just pops up but stays long on my screen. 💓 Thank you Masculine for supporting the Feminine, we love you so.